10 Tips to Attract High Value Women
Psychological Secrets to Attraction
If you’ve found yourself here, you are likely struggling with the dating scene, and feel bitter about dating. The good news is, with a little knowledge about the psychology of attraction you can master the "art" of dating & connecting with women. Jump to the 10 Tips Here.
You may think that if you can’t attract women there must be something wrong with who you are, and you want to change that.
Let me tell you, you’re thinking about it all wrong. What if I told you it is your thinking that is getting in the way of the attraction, not who you are inside. What if I told you that if you were really showing your true self you would find lots of women were attracted to you?
How can this be?
You see, when we think too much, when we over think, we have that negative voice inside our heads saying all of these things: “she wont like me” “she probably thinks I’m a loser” “why did I say that I sounded so stupid” “how should I say this, I don’t want to offend her.”
When you have all of THAT going on in your head, you are unable to let your true self show!
You are constantly censoring what you are actually thinking and feeling, you are not being authentic!
It is your authentic YOU that she will like, it is your authentic you that she will fall in love with, it is your authentic you that she will want to get into bed with.
I know you guys have all heard “just be yourself” and you are thinking that being yourself isn’t working. I encourage you to think about what I have said above. You are not actually being yourself in your interactions with women. You are being led by fear of rejection, fear of upsetting her, fear of not being good enough. So you try to finesse all of your interactions to try and get her to like you. You’re going about it all wrong, this makes you look like you have no backbone, no identity, and are not authentic. All of these things are the opposite of attractive. They are unattractive!
Think about how easy it is to interact with your friends and people you are comfortable with. It feels this way because you are not over thinking. You are allowing your thoughts to come naturally and you allow your speech to flow freely. This is your calling to extend this behavior to the women you talk to and date. I bet you will be pleased with the results!
Now on to the tips...
10 Tips to Attract High Value Women
1. Do NOT Be Overly Available.
This is not about playing games. This is about the scarcity principle: the more difficult something is to obtain, the more valuable that thing appears to be. I know you are a valuable man. You have a full life with hobbies, interests, friends, and a career to attend to. That being said, you are not openly available to a woman's every beck and call. The only way you would be is if you are giving up your life for her. You know your worth, so you won't do this.
2. Do You Know What Your Eyes Are Doing?
Eye contact is sexy! Connecting through the eyes makes her feel like she’s the only one in the room, and the only one you are focused on. Don’t stare her down, but you also don’t want to be looking all over the room. Something important to note here, if you are using good eye contact, try to notice if she is returning the favor. If she is avoiding your eye contact she’s likely not feeling connected, or feeling uncomfortable. In this case, keep the conversation light, pull back on the eye contact and consider moving on with your mingling.
3. Stop Racing to the Finish Line!
Pace yourself. Don't be 'all in' too fast. Don't constantly text her. Don't express your strong feelings for her within the first few weeks. When you guys see something you want, you know it, fast! Women take a little longer. They need to feel secure, they need to feel they can trust you, they need time to see who you really are. Pushing her, or coming on too strong before she's had a chance to 'learn you' will only push her away. The fix? Be consistent. Do what you say you are going to do. Don't bombard her with text messages and calls. Don't act like it bothers you if she takes hours or a day or two to respond to you. If you want a way to make it clear you care about her all you have to do is plan dates. Pick the place, set up the plans, and make things as easy as can be for her. All she needs to do is show up (or be ready for you to pick her up). A woman will know you are into her if you are investing time with her!
4. If You Feel Something, Say It!
Your authentic, un-censored self is SEXY to a woman! Censoring your thoughts before you speak will only trip you up, make you feel and look awkward, and leave you not knowing what to say. Getting over the fear of being yourself begins with confidence that you are good enough.
5. Be Fully Present in Your Masculine Energy.
Make the choices, take the lead, ask her out, don't apologize for your opinions. Women are attracted to strength. Strength comes in many forms (not just physical) and strength doesn't mean steamrolling everyone and being rude, strength means having confidence in who you are as a person and never apologizing for being authentic!
6. Chivalry is Not Dead.
A high value woman will LOVE the fact that you are looking out for her. Open the door, open her car door, don’t make her slide over in the Uber (you can walk around). The deeper meaning here is being in your masculine, so she that can be in her feminine. A woman is attracted to a man who can protect her (this is ingrained in our DNA as females!) No matter how powerful the woman (high paying job, life fully put together) she will always be attracted to the man who she feels can protect her. This even means the bad boy, ever wonder why great women end up with jerks? This is because her primal brain is telling her that this ‘bad boy’ has something that can protect her. Don’t be a bad boy. Be a good guy, who displays power and strength: confidence, decision making skills, chivalry.
7. Add Value to Her Life.
A high value woman has a LOT going on in her life. She has a lot of responsibilities and things that she cares about that she needs to dedicate her time to. With that said, she will have time for you - if - you add value to her life! Remember, one of the reasons you find her attractive in the first place is because of the life she has cultivated for herself. She is dynamic, she is thoughtful, she is active, she is goal oriented. How do you add value? Adding value to someone's life comes in many forms! You add value through stimulating conversations. You add value through your thoughtfulness and your attention to detail related to her interests and preferences. You add value by being a highly developed man yourself! You have your own life, with its richness of hobbies, interests, activities, goals and dreams. It is through this depth that she sees your value, is excited by you, and wants you in her life.
8. Strength Through Body Language.
If you have heard this before it is because of how simple yet important this tip is. Your body language communicates a very important and strong message to those around you. Are you hunched over? Are you fidgeting? Are you avoiding eye contact? Are you looking down at yourself? Your clothing? Pulling at your shirt? Confidence is communicated through good posture, eye contact, calm movements. Much of the time, if a woman has decided you are not the one for her before you even say a word to her, it is because of something she has noticed in your body language. I promise you, no matter how much 'better looking' you think the next guy is, body language matters more. Want to learn how to win at non-verbal communication? Book a personalized coaching session here!
9. Build the Chemistry Between You.
You want her to see you as the sexy man in her life. Not her brother or friend. How do you begin to build the sexual chemistry and tension between the two of you without coming on too strong? This is without a doubt a delicate balance in the beginning. You don't want to come on too strong and push her away if she's not ready for physical touch. But wait too long, you might lose your window of opportunity and this is where some men fall into the friend-zone. A good way to introduce some physical touch in the early stages is putting your hand lightly on her shoulder, brush your hand against hers, touch the small of her back to guide her to the table at the restaurant. You can assess from here how she is receiving your touch. Does she pull away or does it seem as though she welcomes your touch?
10. Hold Back the Assumptions.
Your self talk (the things you tell yourself) has a big impact on the things that happen in your life. Most of the time, our self talk is made up of assumptions that we make about other people, why people do the things they do, and what another person must think about us. Did you know humans are known to make incorrect assumptions about others on the regular? Think about the last time you walked behind someone into a store and they didn't hold the door open for you and let the door slam in your face... Did you make an assumption about what type of person they are? You are probably mistaken if you assumed they are rude and inconsiderate. Did you know that the way people behave is largely based on the environment and current circumstances, and not their inner traits of being good or bad? In the door scenario, the explanation here would be they just had a horrible fight with their spouse, or they didn't think to hold the door for you because they are rushing to the store to buy popsicles for their sick kiddo. The point here is that making negative assumptions about others (or about how we think others perceive us) does us no good. It just puts us in a bad head space, a bad mood, and it dampens our confidence. So the next time you quickly assume that the gorgeous beauty you see out and about would want nothing to do with you - I challenge you to consider how real this negative self talk and assumption is, and how it is killing your chance at finding a wonderful love! Next time, try and turn down the volume a bit!
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Does this sound familiar?
Spend tons of time crafting the perfect, thoughtful message, only for her to NEVER answer.
Wondering why she even gave you her number in the first place?
Feeling like all of the cute girls don't give you the time of day?
Blank out when approaching women?
Waiting around for her to finally notice your value?
Playing it safe as a friend in hopes she will see you romantically "one day"
Spending hours thinking about what you should or shouldn't have said?
Always being there for her, but never getting the same in return?